I. about where people end up in their lives and why. The differences between people that chose to be teachers, nurses, firemen, or neuro scientists. Are the people that write NYT Bestsellers, are CEO's of Fortune 500 companies, or affect some sort of world altering change, like Nelson Mandella, are these people born to be successful?
It's not a new question. For as long as we humans have made our way in the world, we have wondered why we end up wherever it is we find ourselves. People have always questioned, how much of what happens to us in life is pre-determined? Some of us have faith that guides us, believe in destiny, maybe you have always felt with unwavering certainty that you should be an orthodontist. But I want to know is what are the differences between us that cause our paths to splinter and head in different directions. Could Michael Jordan just as easily have been a world champion chess player?
If you believe that the tools to being successful (or not) are taught from our parents and a solid education, than yes, you'll be more successful if you are born in an environment that is conducive and supportive of achievement. All star quarterback Dads spawn aspiring all star quarterback boys. They put their potential legacy in the pee wee league shortly after kindergarten and support them with the best coaching money can buy. However any parent knows that despite the best parenting, schooling, and preparation you "invest" in your child it is all for not if your kid isn't interested.
And if these is a gene, hard coded in our DNA that leads people to be successful, can that person than do anything they want? Or are they just fumbling around until they blossom in the field that will be their one true calling? I'd like to think that a well adjusted person can be successful in just about any environment.
David Dobbs presents a theory on The Science of Success in this way. Most of us are dandelions. Adaptable, flexible, and capable of taking root in just about any environment and being successful. Others, orchids. Fragile, tempered, who with proper care and preparation can bloom beautifully. "These dandelion children—equivalent to our “normal” or “healthy” children, with “resilient” genes—do pretty well almost anywhere, whether raised in the equivalent of a sidewalk crack or a well-tended garden. Ellis and Boyce offer that there are also “orchid” children, who will wilt if ignored or maltreated but bloom spectacularly with greenhouse care."
Many very successful people, while they may have an abundance of business savvy, negotiating skills, risk aversion, and lots of other wonderful things, are completely lacking in the personality department. True, perhaps a rocket scientist doesn't need to be a social butterfly and there are certainly other exceptions, but isn't it true that your relationships with people and who you are as a person is what makes the difference? I . These are the hard work people, not the luck people.
Think we're all a bit curious about just how much control we have over our lives. Clearly an individual has the ability to control what they become. This is why there are preschools in Manhattan that cost $20K + a year. There of course is a possibility that even if you attended the best preschool, listen to Mozart in Utero and get your Phd that you still will have no idea how to make your life a success.
But who even says what that success means? I think as long as you're satisfied with where you are, than you should be happy. And as far as what you need along the way, all I can say that with foresight, vision, a little chutzpah, we should do just fine.
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